Wednesday 11 January 2012

Rejected beer names: PSAles

While we very much enjoy sharing condo-brewed beer with friends and family, we dream of one day unleashing our magnum opus (or magnum opera... seriously, that's the plural form of opus) upon the discerning beer-drinking populace. A strong product can succeed by merit alone, but marketing, and more specifically, catchy and/or clever beer names, can help that product to stand out in an increasingly crowded marketplace.

So naturally, we got to thinking - what would we name our beer? 'Magnum opus' is actually kind of an awesome name, but it doesn't leave much room for further brand development. We have some great ideas... but we're not ready to share them at this point in time. We are, however, more than happy to share some of our other ideas that fell short (or were devised solely for our own entertainment), through posts appropriately titled: 'Rejected beer names.'

Rejected beer names: PSAles

Everyone loves a good public service announcement (PSA). From Astar, the acrobatic gold robot who could put his arm back on (but obviously had some serious issues to be swinging around in the vicinity of giant rotating blades), to those somewhat amorphous, furry blue and pink creatures that sang about what you should or should not put in your mouth (evidently beets are on the 'safe' list), PSAs play an important role in the development and reinforcement of important life lessons.

Could we possibly harness this power to draw attention to important issues in daily life? Could our beers be agents of change and transformation for beer-drinking adults? Which issues should we focus on? Here are a few that we came up with:

Tip Your Barber Bitter - These guys are the cornerstones of the community, and are generally a more economical option than fancy salons. Not that I'd know. Fine, I get my hair cut at a salon. I can't hide anything from you. 

Spay or Neuter Your Pet Pale - Any Price is Right fan knows that controlling the pet population is a serious issue. This narrowly beat out Bob Barker Says 'No' Nut Brown due to possible contextual misinterpretation.

Avoid Public Pant-Shed Red - This one pretty much speaks for itself. Remember that old adage, 'if tempted to let one's pants drop, steel your will and try to stop.' Okay, I made that up. Seriously, though, keep your pants on.

Don't Wedgie a Child Mild - I know it's tempting. They're smaller than you. You could easily grab that waistband and lift them clear off the ground. No one would believe them if they said anything. I mean, you're an adult, right? But still, you probably shouldn't do it.

That's all we have for now, but if you can think of any other solid names for PSAles, we'd love to hear them!

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